For as long as I can remember, I have always fretted about my weight. It’s interesting to look back and pin point the moment when you stopped being a carefree child and became a conscious girl with body issues. I think mine was in 5th grade when I had a thin best friend, who had beautiful older sisters. I couldn’t help but compare myself to them. It wasn’t as if I was fat, just had the typical body of a 11-year-old. Move it along a few years later, puberty struck leaving me with big boobs and about 15 extra pounds. I was NOT happy about it. All I wanted was to feel petite and healthy. Over time, I accepted my body shape and what I have to work with. But no matter what diet or with what effort, I’ve never truly reached my weight loss & body goals.
Up until about a year or so ago, I was at a pseudo-happy low weight (around 130 pounds). I was working in NYC as a Sales Assistant for a magazine & living in Hoboken, a great town right outside the city. Living that life was a dream come true, except the fact that my salary was extremely meager. So between rent, monthly bills, gym membership, & a large social life, buying food was the last priority. So hip hurray to the starving artist diet, I was at my ideal weight.
But then I got a boyfriend; a great guy who not only loved me the way I was, but was a fantastic cook & enjoyed going out for meals. Slowly but surely, the weight crept on….It wasn’t his fault in any way, obviously he wanted me to be healthy and fit. But basically,I gave into heavier meals and dinners out & spent more time with him and less at the gym.
Present day, I am currently living with my boyfriend Kyle in New Zealand! I know, random. One of the things that brought us together initially was the desire to travel and go somewhere completely different. Over the course of 9 months, we made all the arrangements and now here we are! It is absolutely a wonderful amazing experience. But with the transistion of living in a new country and with a boyfriend, I have put my diet on the back burner, with only exercising once or so a week.
Lately, I haven’t felt like myself…. just out of sorts. Deep down I know it has to do with being out of control with my health and diet and it needs to change.
SO tomorrow! Monday, February 1st is the start of taking back my health and getting into that awesome shape I have always dreamed of. When I was 19 or so, I did Weight Watchers with my mom and saw results, so I am going to go back with that system. Weight Watchers is great because you can eat pretty much eat anything just as long as the portions are controlled. I think this will be so important for my future because I know I’ll be with Kyle a long time. It would absolutely benefit my future to know how to eat right while he’s cooking. One of the problems I have noticed is allowing myself to eat just as much as he is. In the back of my head a little voice would plead, “stop!! Don’t have another helping! You’re eating too much!” My stomach, however, would mumble, “mind your own business”, and happily accepted more.
But it alllll changes tomorrow.
